Reflective moments....

Today my heart is for some reason extra sensitive.  I feel like the littlest thing is making me cry.  Yesterday was a rough day for me.  Woke up at 4 am and couldn't fall back asleep, subbed for a 7th grade language arts class and had to physically break up a fist fight during class, got an email from a lady canceling a party, got another email from a lady expressing frustration with some things (harsh words are VERY hard for me to hear...especially when directed at me, I ponder them for days), hurt by some other things that happened, had a POUNDING headache all day long, then got some terrible news about someone I am very close with.  My heart was heavy last night and I was anxious to just crawl into bed.

This morning I woke up with that same heaviness.  My heart just hurts for the broken and hurting.  I have spent much needed time with the Lord this morning and as always it is refreshing, but it just leaves me feeling more aware of my need for his active presence in my life.  Today my heart is soft and Jesus has been extra close that which I am so thankful for.  I often picture him hanging out with Keira and I during the day.  Just watching her with complete awe as I do.  There are moments when I feel like He's telling me how beautiful she is to him.  That makes me smile and I continue to make that a prayer over her life...that she would be so fully aware of God's deep, unconditional love and pursuit of her.  She has given me joy today.  I love turning around to see her and she just squirms with excitement that I'm paying attention to her.  Her little voice and sighs as she plays absolutely melts my heart.  There is no other place that I'd rather be than here with her today.  We occasionally have these moments where we just stare into each others eyes.  She stops moving, I stop moving and we just look at each other.  It's in those moments that I know our souls are communicating.  She can't talk yet or understand my words, but it's in those moments that we share our love for each other.  It's one of the most satisfying things I've ever known.  She is physically a part of me and when they say a mother's connection with her babies is deep, I now know what they are talking about.

Anyways, I'm obviously in a deep reflective mood today.  Take my thoughts for what they are.  I'm off to put my girl down for a nap.